Reflecting and Debating

HopNob:So my mom is completely hating me right now...

Completely

Alex: why?

HopNob: she's not well. Makes her half crabby...

Then I don’t exactly act the dutiful daughter...

Alex: hmm

HopNob: n I’m all demands like "aaaaaaaaai neeeeeeeed myyyyyyyyy compppputttttttttterrrrrrrrrrrrrrr"

And "stfu. I'm watching a movie"

Plus I don’t move my ASS when imp sitting down to do stuff...

Alex: ete eto rege rege jawar ki accche?

HopNob: any stuff...

Laptop.

Study

Movie.

I don’t like being disturbed from it.

Alex: that’s a good thing.

HopNob: not necessarily

Alex: khub bhalo kore korish jetai korish...

HopNob: u knows...

My mom.

She never had so many demands of me earlier...

Delhi n all...

I was to concentrate on studies n friends

Alex: hmm

HopNob: n that's all...

N now it’s all... doing this does that...

She keeps so busy...

Alex: maybe cuz ur growing up n all

HopNob: n then she'll say im rude...

well obviously I am...

that's how I am!

Alex: one day u should tell her that they don’t give YOU any time anymore

HopNob: that

no Alex...

they're doing all they're doing for me...

c'mon...

Alex: yeah I know

HopNob: that's like the most insensitive thing to say...

but it's jus that there's aLOT I do not like about where I'm standing right now...

Alex: yeaah

like what?

HopNob: and all that pent up frustration comes out in different ways

my parents were shocked when they heard I’ve started becoming violent in my sleep...

and I’m mostly bitchy like everything around me is everybody else's fault

and I realize im being bitchy

but I can't stop being it.

Alex: of course

ur frusst

cuz of ur sister

she’s making me frusst cuz ur getting frusst

HopNob: im pissed.

like right now.

I have to go

brb

Alex: frusst hence pissed

log out when u go

HopNob: and we're back.

Alex: log out when u do

cuz she might see

HopNob: im back im back.

yeah she might

and it doesn’t matter...

what I realize Alex...

Alex: yea?

HopNob: is that im pissed

and when im pissed

I get this vile hatred for the people that piss me off

Alex?

Alex: am here.

HopNob: and in that time...

Alex: am always there.

HopNob: I see AAAALLLLL the negative there is in them

I hunt them down

n I create a human so vile out of them that I hate them even more

(I know ur always there... :])

so when I say my sis is this and that...

im only realllllyyy pissed with her

when I say JINI is this n that...

im pissed with jini...

Alex: she is capable of pissing of people without opening her mouth.

HopNob: when I say u r this n that...

im mega pissed with you...

Alex: the day I was telling both of u the things jusie does.. ur sister was smirking all the time as if am making it all up.

its only cuz' ur sister...

that I kept quiet.

HopNob: and Alex, YOU tend to see things from my point of view alone on things you don’t know n I tell you about...

?

when was this?

Alex

Alex...

Alex: oi

toh jedin lunch kehlam

tor barite

HopNob: hm..

sigh..

no my point Alex is that..

Alex: is?

HopNob: is that, without any self reprimand... I realize that this is all me...

And because it's all me...

I won’t be able to change it.

Alex: this is all you?

HopNob: Because all that I say I do not like about Kolkata is basically things I do not like about me...

Alex: your sister is responsible for anything.

Everything.

HopNob: everything I complain about has a contribution from me...

Alex: *

HopNob: and though I feel extremely benevolent in having admitted that...

I know things aren't going to be any different...

And will probably turn for the worse from here...